Still worried

I went to visit my mother in hospital yesterday and she is not looking at all good. At first she didn't even recognise me. The drug cocktail she has been prescribed has her feeling extremely disorientated and nauseous and yet she is still in a great deal of pain. I really think they need to do something to alleviate the cause of the pain rather than just dosing her up but the consultant will not be back until tomorrow.

When I got to the hospital she was lying on the bed holding onto a damp flannel which she held across her eyes and forehead like her life depended on it. She just kept repeating that she didn't know where she was and that she couldn't take much more of this. Later when she was a little more lucid (it comes and goes in waves) she told me that the flannel is the only thing that is keeping her sane. I had taken her a small fluffy black dog with really soft fur and she held it in her other hand mumbling about how soft it was. I think it really helped her have something to hold on to.

Being diabetic my mother has to take insulin and so it is important for her to eat. Unfortunately as she is feeling nauseous it is hard to get her to eat, but it is so important that she does. I had taken her some fresh fruit salad as I know my mum likes fruit. Thank goodness that I did as everything the hospital gave her made her feel worse but she ate some of the fruit before becoming disorientated once more. I insisted on seeing the nurse and her drugs have been adjusted slightly in the hope that this will help.

We are still uncertain as to what is wrong with my mother but it seems likely that two or three of her vertebra have crumbled causing the discs to slip and press on the sciatic nerve. I am terribly worried that this will mean that she will be wheel chair bound for the rest of her life now. My mother is pretty disabled anyway but fiercely tries to keep mobile as much as she can, even if it is just a few metres that she can walk. I know that if she can't walk at all this will upset her very much.

At the moment though I just hope that they do something to help her soon. It is extremely upsetting to see someone you love in such much distress and not be able to help. I stayed for a while and held her hand though she nodded off for much of the time. When we left I promised her I would return soon and then I went to have dinner with my dad. We took him to a nice pub nearby and bought him dinner which he enjoyed immensely. I didn't want him having dinner on his own. He is holding up okay but I can tell he is worried. I am too. Thanks for all your kind comments. Please keep sending the positive thoughts, they are much appreciated.