Friday, November 07, 2008

Feeling Like Rocky

“Life hits harder than any man can, and one's ability to keep getting up until the final bell rings is the true measure of self.” ~ Rocky Balboa

A cheesy quote? Perhaps, but it hits home for me at the moment (no pun intended). Work continues to keep me busy, as does the everyday niff naff and trivia that surfaces. As ever I have had little time for blogging lately but this week or so I have not felt like it much. It’s not that I have nothing to say, but that I haven’t got the energy or inclination to discuss it. I’m pre-occupied I’m afraid.

I found a sizeable lump in my neck. At first I thought it was a swollen thyroid as I have been feeling tired as well as having a few other symptoms that match this kind of problem. So I went to the doctors. He immediately ordered blood tests and an urgent scan (which I have to wait 5-6 weeks for before a diagnosis can be made). I did not like the use of the word ‘urgent’. Apparently it’s most likely a cyst that is having an adverse affect on my health but (and here is where the doctor became tight lipped) it might not be. I’m trying not to think about it but at the back of my mind is the nagging little thought…’what if it is something else?’ Mind you, if it is a cyst it’s not exactly a barrel of laughs as the treatment involves medication to control my thyroxine levels and possible a fine needle biopsy, and drain or surgery to remove it, depending on what is revealed by the scan.

I can’t help but feel a bit picked on as it seems as if I just overcome one thing to be faced with another challenge. I know that railing at the universe and shouting at windmills solves nothing but its all part of the process. For now I am resigned to waiting. I don’t like not knowing.


R. Sherman said...

You have been through a lot, so feel free to rant to your heart's content. We'll listen.

BTW only in a country with government provided health care would "urgent" translate to six weeks. Here, you could have your scan and the results on the same day.

Cheers, dear. We're thinking of and praying for you.

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

Yeah, you're due for nothing more than some worn-out nerves, that's for sure.

Hang in there and yes, talk to us if you need to. You know we'll be a support system for you.

Melody said...

Oh dear. Thinking of you my dear BK. There is *nothing* worse than waiting...waiting...waiting.

Good thoughts being sent your way.


Sleepypete said...

Fingers crossed that it's nothing serious :-)

kenju said...

Bob-Kat, I hope it will be nothing but a benign cyst. You can feel free to rant or complain all you want - and we will listen.

Nikki-ann said...

Ouch. I'm sorry to hear that. I hope all goes well and it's nothing serious. Melody is right, there's nothing worse than waiting. I hope the results come through quick, despite the expected wait. Take care of yourself.

Last Girl On Earth - Deni said...

I'm so sorry you have to go through this. Hang in there and keep the faith.

Gwynne said...

Yes, please, feel free to rant. And my prayers are for some boring results!

Angie said...

Other people have it way worse, but you know what? That doesn't matter because this is happening to YOU! It's affecting YOU! So rant and rave and rail and scream and get mad all you want. You're allowed.

I hope everything comes out OK!!

I'm visiting via Michele, today.

PI said...

Hi Bob-kat. Came via Randall's and sorry to hear you are under the weather . It's good for you to air it so feel free to rail a much as you like. I suffered a lot from 'swollen glands' as a teenager so I hope it is nothing worse than that.
Whatever- it shows that you are run-down and need some renewal time. I hope you are able to do this and meanwhile remember worrying is not going to help - on the contrary. Try to concentrate on thinking positive thoughts and be very kind to yourself. All best wishes. Pat

rashbre said...

Hoping its just a signal to take care of yourself.