Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Long overdue update

I have been absent for some time and until I checked the date on my last post, I hadn't realised how long. From my blog stats I can see that very few people drop by and so I am probably talking to myself, though I am pretty certain a couple of my oldest blog friends will check in.

My situation at the moment is complicated. I have very little time or energy for much once work has taken more than it's fair share these days. In short I am very busy at work but very unhappy as well. I feel that I am being set up to fail for a number of reasons but I don't want to go into any more detail here. You never know who is reading. I used to blog at lunchtime but now often work through lunches.

I am so far behind on my chores at home that I just see things to do wherever I look. The list lengthens and no matter how much I seem to do, it never seems to make a difference. Just keeping the house clean is a challenge. My garden is a mess. Weeds have more or less taken over. There are dead things in pots which saddens me as I haven't had time to do anything. I fear pygmy warriors may have taken up residence in the dense undergrowth, but they too are on my list to evict.

Not everything is negative. I launched my photography portfolio website and have been working on improving my photography lately. I potentially have commissions to do a small wedding and a couple of family portraits. This is something I enjoy and this creative outlet can be a real sanity saver at times.

A blog friend commented that I had been lost to Facebook. Yes, I am active on FB, but it is not the reason I am not here. It takes just a few moments a day to update my status and check in on others through the news feed. I actually find FB to be 'noisy' with no real intimacy. It's a platform where everyone seems to be transmitting but is essentially not emotionally fulfilling like blogging. Or perhaps that's just me. I miss my blog friends but just can't seem to make time to come here and do anything meaningful. I'm working on it.

Ironically, at the same time I have been toying the idea of discontinuing my blog. I am painfully aware I have not seemed to be a good blogger. My problem is threefold. At the moment my life is not running smoothly and I do not want to share these things here. They are negative and boring and there are people who visit here that I don't want to share my inner thoughts with, including a malicious person, which covers the second issue: I do not feel I can share here any more except trivial bits and that is not what I want to write about. The third issue is time and energy. I am toying with the idea of a new blog based more around my photography but with a lot of me thrown in as well. It addresses the issues and I can stay in touch with my blog friends and bring you with me. I'm just thinking at the moment. I'll keep y'all posted. Thanks for popping by. I really do appreciate it.

I've just read this and it seems very negative - I was going to delete it but I it explains a few things. Believe me there are some good things too. Life is never black and white.

16 comments:

kenju said...

I'll vote for anything you decide to do! And I am happy to see you on FB, since you are seldom here - although now I understand why.

kenju said...

The comment is here, Bob-kat - I see it.

R. Sherman said...

Don't delete the blog, in my view. You write for you and not us. We'll visit whenever you post.

I agree with you re: Facebook and Twitter. I do neither because I'd always want to write more than is customary or allowed in such media.

As for being set up to fail, I find such behavior either despicable or indicative of profound stupidity on the part of those responsible. I shall leave it at that.

Know, I will be thinking and praying for your situation, and I hope it improves.

Cheers.

Sleepypete said...

/wave from the Blueyonder :-)

Finding the updates a bit strange with my blog too. We "Do Stuff" but when we come to thinking about tapping out a blog post, we don't know where to start. I've never blogged at work, I don't want to expose that password to an insecure and possibly keylogged environment (Yep - I'm that paranoid about the IT admins)

FB vs Blog - agreed. FB status updates are rarely more than 10 words, which doesn't let you really grasp an issue. Putting a wall of text on the blog lets you think through what's bugging you, allowing you to put the thoughts in some kind of order.

FB is also infested with application updates. Whenever I see a new application update appear, I'll block the app. 1 - to reduce the noise, 2 - to block access to my data. (Lol - I still have the automatic 1/day maze updates contributing to noise though)

I'm struggling a bit too with the blog updates, I seem to be only managing 1 a week at the moment even though I could be talking about the cricket :-)

PS I'm doing my bit too for keeping the country carbon neutral by not discouraging the green stuff.

pink dogwood said...

whatever you do - don't disappear please.

I also have been very inactive on the blogger. I also used to write some posts at lunch time but now dont have that time. But the difference is that I am not unhappy at work, so I don't mind the extra hours. I truly hope your situation changes.

A new blog with photography and lot more of you thrown in there sounds good.

I don't come here often, but I would like to know that you are here when I do have time to come and see how you are doing.

best wishes :)

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

Yeah, what Kenju said. I get the Facebook thing -- it's fast, it's easy, and you get e-mail telling you the conversation is going on.

And don't worry about your stats. They don't show those of us who've got you on their feed reader and who stop in as soon as you pop up.

Hang in there. If you decide to ditch the troll, please remember to send me the new url!

rashbre said...

Yes, we are all still reading, even if some of us forget to post comments(!)

I use lists when I'm stuck with lots of things to do. Its satisfying to cross things off.

And sometime I just decide they are not necessary items to complete.

Best.

srp said...

On my Safari, your page snapshot sits on my most looked at list and it lets me know when you have a new post. I miss those lovely kitties.... I think mine like to see others of their kind.

I never have understood Facebook. It is easier to collect my thoughts... well, most of the time.... and blog them. We are still here!!!!

Linda said...

Well, my dear...I do keep up with you on FB, and agree with you on the impersonality of the place...

I'm glad your photography is picking up; it feels great to be able to do something you love and make money for it. Perhaps, as business picks up, you may consider doing that full time!

I don't think you should delete your blog. It's a personal place for you. And while you may not feel like posting all the time, when you do, you know that you'll get response! And remember, it IS your blog, so you can share as little or as much...and as often or infrequently as you wish. I'll be here!

Linda said...

Well, my dear...I do keep up with you on FB, and agree with you on the impersonality of the place...

I'm glad your photography is picking up; it feels great to be able to do something you love and make money for it. Perhaps, as business picks up, you may consider doing that full time!

I don't think you should delete your blog. It's a personal place for you. And while you may not feel like posting all the time, when you do, you know that you'll get response! And remember, it IS your blog, so you can share as little or as much...and as often or infrequently as you wish. I'll be here!

Mar said...

I am here, too, Bob-kat!! sending hugs your way...

Kathryn said...

I'm here! I'm here! And i do care. I don't usually pop in when there isn't a new post.

Do what you like best, but there are obviously folks just waiting to hear from you. Write for you. I understand having to be cautious in what you say, i've run up such a situation a couple of times. I also limit who i "invite" to view my blog so that i don't have to worry about offending family. But i'm over all pretty honest in what i say. It feels better to me & other folks seem to respond to honesty.

Kathryn said...

Oh, meant to say, i totally agree with you about FB. It has served me well in a couple of things. I "see" what friends are doing. I have gotten to know one of my nieces better - because she makes an effort to connect with me. But over all, i've been disappointed that i have "reconnected" with people from my past & then we never talk to each other.

Nikki-ann said...

I do hope you continue to blog in some way as I do enjoy your posts.

I kinda know what you mean about having a malicious person reading your blog... I have one and you might have noticed the lack of anything remotely personal on my blog for the past 6 months or so, especially lately. It's annoying to say the least.

OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

WEll..It is so good to know you have updated, my dear. I don't have all those different things that tell a person when someone has a new post up--I just take my chances and visit--So, I would very much miss you if you stopped Blogging. Peraps you should set up a Password Protectd Blog--other people have dome that, and it seems to work well. At least that way, no Malicious person can get through....

It is hard for me to understand why people do FB if it so unsatisfying...What is the reason? As to having the time to blog--I certainly can understand the difficulties of NOT having the time, and, mixed with not feeling free to speak your mind as you would like, makes it that much harder.
I miss you being a part of Blogging...So, my feelings are selfish, I confess. Yet, I know you must do what you need to do, my dear B-K, I just hope it doesn't include shutting this blog down, OR, not blogging at all. I would miss you terribly--I tuly would.

And, a very late and belated HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you, dear B-K...I hope you had a really good one!!

OldOldLady Of The Hills said...

I'm just checking in to see how you are doing, my dear. I hope things are going better at work. And I hope you are having some fun taking pictures! Hugs to you and the "kids"....How are those two Beauty's doing> "SWEETIE" sends Purrrrrrs....